A Time to Heal
by momiji-k
Summary: For two years she waited for her love to return. Finally that day has come. What happens now? Once again he has left her behind. New editing and content on chapters 1 thru 4 as of 6.13.07 [Post TV][Post Movie] [SPOILERS] Roy x Riza
1. The Way Life Was

**Disclaimer:** As you all know I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist. I write for fun not for profit.

**Author's Note:** This was my second FMA fic and there are spoilers for the anime and manga. This is a TV series fic but I used something from the manga because it was still possible even though they never showed it in the series. This will use a lot of actual TV series events and some conversations as needed. The rest is my take on what happened after the series and movie.

Please review each chapter if possible. I would like to know what people think and what needs to be improved. Feel free to e-mail me if you notice any mistakes. Thanks!

A Time to Heal

Everyone knew the name Roy Mustang: The Flame Alchemist. The Colonel was well known not just in the military but throughout the entire country. A hero of Ishbal and a man with a reputation as a ladies man. What most people didn't know was that most of his image was just a big game. Those in his very office witnessed many of his phone conversations with one of the many girlfriends. It wasn't uncommon for him to want to leave work early to go on a date. Many were sure to think there wasn't a girl in Central that he hadn't slept with.

There was one person who knew differently. Those that knew of Roy Mustang would have been shocked to hear who he had really been talking to on the phone all those times. A sharp mind might recall that her name was _always_ Elizabeth. If only he had used her real name at least once, someone might have finally put two and two together. But for some reason no one ever figured out that Elizabeth was just an alias.

And all those dates? There were a few here and there mostly stolen from Lieutenant Havoc. Not usually intentionally, it just happened that way. Besides, it was much easier than going out on the town and finding one on his own time. It was all just part of the game, dinner and the theater, nothing that special in Roy's eyes. He would rather talk to his Elizabeth on the phone all day long to tell the truth. No one in Central would ever believe that after each date, Roy Mustang returned home alone to an empty bed.

It was all part of the image he put forth, part of his master plan to become Fuhrer. The higher ups tended to ignore him for all his frivolous actions. Many of them hated the man. He truly had many enemies within the ranks. He was far too young to hold such a high rank and be so well regarded by the general public. They were also jealous of his accomplishments, if you could call being a murderer such a thing. Or at least that is how Roy saw it. His charade kept everyone so busy with the image, that no one saw the real Roy.

Only his "Elizabeth" knew the truth. She knew the real man inside. She held his pain and suffering close to her own heart. She had seen everything with her own eyes, from Ishbal to the daily routine. She scolded him when she knew he strayed from his goal. She sometimes cursed herself that there was only so much she could do for him. The horrors from the war sometimes left him to turn to a drink for comfort. Many nights were sleepless for him, hence why he would fall asleep at his desk the next day. If only he would come to her instead. But that just wasn't an option for him. She was there to support him and help push him up to the top, a promise she had made long ago. It was a promise made in the hopes that a massacre like Ishbal would never happen again.

Roy had been a dreamer in his youth and had learned alchemy with the intention of helping people. He saw the military as another chance to help people as well. If he became a state alchemist he would be given funds to do research, research that he also thought would help people. Sadly things in life are never what they seem and people with kind hearts like Roy are most often taken advantage of.

Through a turn of events Roy shared his dream with Riza of a nation that was peaceful and for the people. He planned to help bring the this change about by doing his part in the military. With her father now gone and no other family for her to be with Riza follow Roy and joined the military herself. She became a deadly sharpshooter and was sent to the front lines of Ishbal to finish out her military training as a sniper. Protecting the soldiers and state alchemists from the shadows was how she spent her time in the desert. When the war was over her innocent eyes had turned into those of a killer, just like the man she followed.

How did Roy Mustang, then only a Major fit into all of this you ask? He was used by the military as a human weapon. The military is a great organization that uses people for their own gain as Roy quickly found out. As a newly instated State Alchemist he was also sent to the front lines to wage war on people of Ishbal. Thanks to the awesome powers of such alchemists as he entire towns were leveled in moments. A race of people brought to devastation in the name of justice. But who's justice was this?

The end of the war found many broken men and women both from Ishbal and Amestris. A new promise was made between friends in the aftermath. Roy swore to his best friend Maes Hughes that he would become Fuhrer and make sure that something like Ishbal would _never _happen again. Hearing of this renewed promise to change this horrid country Riza requested to be under the newly promoted Lt. Colonel. Upon presenting herself to him as one of his new subordinates she promised to follow him as Hughes had. She would be there below him, pushing him up to the top.

This brings us back from our little journey into the past where our subject Colonel Roy Mustang is about to start another glorious day in the life of the Amestris military…..

He was late again, she thought as she looked at the clock on the office wall. It had been another sleepless night for him she was sure. While he used to get there early, since the death of Hughes he struggled just to get out of bed. Although she sympathized with him he would still get a scolding from her when he came in. She had to keep him focused, no matter how much it hurt they had to move on. Maes Hughes would have wanted them to keep striving toward the goal. It was just that important, not just to Roy but to all of them. Just then Colonel Mustang came gliding through the door as if on cue.

"You're late, sir." "Elizabeth", also known as Riza Hawkeye by her real name, reprimanded her superior officer as he sauntered to his large desk.

A slight smirk played at his lips as he eased himself into his chair. _She just never lets it go_. 'The Colonel had to laugh at himself for answering to the woman who was under his rank. Most might think it odd that a Colonel's assistant would give _him _orders. But this was just the routine, she always kept him in line. He needed it sometimes.

"Please get started on your paper work, Sir. I don't want to have to stay after hours today." The First Lieutenant spoke from her desk, already busy at work with her own duties. She made no eye contact with him as she continued to shuffle and sort the papers she was to complete before the morning was over.

"Why is that?" A mischievous look betrayed his face. "Do you have a date?" The Colonel couldn't resist the smartass reply. He quickly got busy himself in fear of the dangerous look he knew would be aimed his way. He knew the answer to his own question before he asked it. She never went out unless you can call walking her dog Black Hayate a date.

"Why of course not, _Sir." _She gritted out his rank through clenched teeth. "I just thought it would be nice to spend my evening taking Black Hayate for a walk or reading a book, instead of babysitting for a change." Riza just keep working as she made her point clear to the Colonel that she wasn't up for any slacking today. Lately they had been staying late to finish up the days work and she just wanted to go home on time for a change.

Roy couldn't blame her it was all his fault, really. He was so unfocused and depressed lately. There had been a lot of days where he truly had been slacking and it was her that had to pick up the pace. Though he had good reasons to be in a funk life didn't wait for anything. Those that were still here among the living had a reason to be here, and there was work to do. He made note to try to get his act together and get back on track.

Riza was pleasantly surprised that Roy really took her words to heart. He worked pretty diligently for most of the day. At one point Riza looked over to her Colonel's desk where he was slumped back in his chair an open book on his face. She inwardly sighed, not in frustration but in sympathy. Any other day this week and she would have yelled at him to get back to work. But today she felt a pang in her heart _j__ust a little while_ she thought to herself. He really had been working hard today and she had seen that old spark back in his eyes. She was glad for that since she wasn't feeling so well and she was getting run down herself.

Since the death of Hughes everything had been a struggle for Roy. He was a mess the first few days despite the fact that he carried himself well in public. His walls came down after the burial ceremony and it was just himself and Hawkeye left standing vigial. At that moment it seemed that Roy had one less reason to strive for the top. There was one less person in Amestris to protect. But maybe it should have given him one more reason instead, to honor his memory. Either way, his fight to the top was never easy and it was starting to cost him dearly. Now it was especially hard without Hughes pushing him up. Riza knew that the Colonel needed her more than ever and she was always there. Just like Hughes and her self had always done, she stayed below pushing him up.


	2. Remembering That Painful Night

**Author's Note: **Chapter has been revamped as of 6/11/07. Please check my profile for updates and status on all my stories.

Chapter 2

All was going according to plan or so she silently prayed. She looked down at her hands bound by cold steel, her wrists felt uncomfortable against the metal. Out of no where screeching tires and the sounds of metal on metal filled the air. That was when the monstrous man known as Colonel Archer showed up. He was headed to the Fuhrer's to stop Colonel Mustang plan. She had to do something, she couldn't let him get in the way.

The soldiers tried their best to calm the rampaging soldier down. He was obviously agitated and off his rocker as well. The soldiers explained that everything was under control and that they were to take Lieutenant Hawkeye to headquarters.

"Hawkeye, What's _she_ doing here!" Archer's voice was cold and metallic. He opened fire on the car she was riding in, giving her little time to prepare. Those that tried to calm him yet again were met with bullets or an unforgiving steel arm.

She grabbed a gun and returned fire but Archer still managed to hit her. He took off in the direction to the Fuhrer's mansion and Hawkeye wasted no time retrieving a key for the belt of a fallen soldier. After releasing the handcuffs she quickly followed Archer for all she was worth. Her arm ached as she ran, blood soaked her jacket just below the shoulder where Archer's bullet had grazed her. She ignored the pain and pushed forward. Gun held tightly in her hands, ready to fire. She had to make it in time, _please God_ she said in silent prayer _let me make it_.

For what seemed like an eternity she ran, ran as fast as her legs could carry her. Finally she came upon the gate of the mansion a crimson glow emitted from just beyond. Archer's large back came into view and she didn't hesitate to aim her gun and pull the trigger. Aiming for his "human" side she efficiently filled him with 7 bullets, everyone of them hit it's mark. He jerkily turned as though he was going to return fire but instead collapsed in a heap.

After defeating Archer she continued to run toward the mansion. Out of breath she pushed herself onward as the front steps came into her view. Her heart stopped as she noted the lifeless bodies that lay ahead, she gasped as she momentarily paused.

Ascending the steps she ran to his lifeless form, blood pooling out from beneath it. Bending over him now, she shook his body as she called out frantically. "Colonel! Colonel! Colonel!" She called out desperately and received no answer. "Roy Mustang!" She shouted out followed by quiet sobs as her voice died down from screaming his name. She clung to his side as the tears stared to fall. The ran down her face and soaked into Roy's jacket. She placed her forehead to his side as a most heart wrenching scream came from deep within her heart. Sobs wracked her body as she continued to cry. Something no one, not even Roy Mustang had ever seen her do.

Locked in the depths of her despair Riza thought she felt Roy move beneath her. Clawing her way from the haze she reached for his wrist checking for a pulse, she said another silent prayer. He was still warm and the flesh beneath her fingers felt soft and alive. She held her breath as she waited. There it was! It was very, very faint but there was still life left in him. She had to get help and fast!

She sat at his bedside in constant vigil. He had been asleep for five days it seemed like an eternity. He was in rough shape to say the least and it was surprising he was even alive. He had many large wounds over his body from the Fuhrer's sword. The most serious of wounds was where he had been impaled in the chest just above the heart. The sword dragged across his body in excruciating pain. Beyond the constant blood loss from these wounds he was then shot by Colonel Archer in the face.

Bandages now hid his handsome features. The most obvious one was the one on his face. His left eye now damaged beyond repair, a bandage wrapped around that side of his head.

Riza shifted in her chair as she noticed his body begin to stir. A gasp emitted from her slightly parted lips. Her heart lifted as she found hope that things would be all right now. Slowly Roy Mustang opened his right eye and blinked away the brightness that now invaded it. Letting the world come into focus he was unsure of his surroundings. Realizing that he should be dead left him to wonder what had happened that night at the Fuhrer's mansion.

The last thing he remembered was emerging from the mansion only to see Archer appear before him. He vaguely remembered the presence of a woman, her voice called out to him beyond her own panic. All he could see was darkness then he felt her body against his as she cried out in agonizing pain. She sounded like someone had just ripped her beating heart right out of her body. To her it felt like someone really had.

"Riza." It was barely an audible whisper as it escaped his lips. His heart sank as he realized it was her that he was hearing. She was crying. For him? His eye refocused as he now concentrated on his current surroundings. He felt a presence in the room with him one that emitted concern and a familiar comfort. Slowly he turned to see his lieutenant sitting in a rigid chair by his bedside. An expression of relief painted across her face. Reality sunk in as he regarded her expression.

The words caught in the back of her throat, unable to speak. Riza forced herself not to cry. She had to be strong for her Colonel. She had already failed him once, she would not do so again.

"Lieutenant." The word quietly slipped out of his dry mouth. "Riza." He quickly followed up, letting a little surprise and delight tinge his voice.

"Colonel!" Riza finally found her voice as she sprang closer to his bed no longer able to hide her excitement at his awakening.

"It's ok for you to call me Roy." His voice remained low, unable to gather the strength to speak any louder.

"Roy." She smiled at him almost lovingly as she let his name flow off her tongue.

"What happened?" He asked her unsure as to how he arrived at his current location.

"Sir… Roy." She corrected herself as old habits die hard. "I found you on the mansion steps. We rushed you to the hospital as soon as we could."

"What happened…… to Archer?" He struggled to speak ask the many days of inactivity started to really show.

"I shot him, sir." Her voice was low now, as she remembered that painful night. The night she though the man that she lived for had died right in front of her.

"I'm sorry." He had a pained look in his eye as he turned away from her momentarily.

"For what, sir?" Still finding it hard to kick her old habit she spoke softly in response.

"I am sorry you had to face him alone. I am sorry I could not defeat him myself." He struggled to keep his voice strong so she would not worry any more about his condition. "I am Sorry for all I have put you through." He spoke as if realizing for the first time all the terrible things she was forced to do by serving him.

"It's all part of my duty. As long as you're safe, that is all that matters. I will fight the devil himself if that is what it takes to protect you." Her voice was soft and genuine. "Even if it goes beyond my duty." She smiled sadly as she briefly remembered thinking she had lost him that night for what must have been the hundredth time since the event.

Just as Roy opened his mouth to speak a nurse stepped in to check on the patient. "Oh!" She was a little startled to see the normally closed eye was now open. "You're awake!" She couldn't hide the surprise and relief in her own voice.

"I think I will go get some fresh air." Riza stated as she arose from her chair by Roy's side, quickly she left the room so the nurse could tend to her patient in privacy.

"That's one dedicated subordinate you have there Colonel Mustang." The older nurse gave him a smile as she spoke. "I swear she has never left your side the five days you have been here." She looked at him with a knowing eye.

Roy's face showed a little bit of shock at that though. His look almost turned painful as he oddly found himself voicing his thoughts. "She's more than that. She is…. my everything." He paused for a moment as if trying to collect his thoughts. "Someday….. I hope to tell her that. When I become a man that deserves her."

The nurse couldn't hide her down-curved lips. "Honey, every woman deserves to be with the man she loves, no matter who he is. Let her make that choice."

Roy was almost taken aback at that though. He always knew that their relationship ran deeper than what was on the surface. It was almost like they shared an unspoken love. But surely he was not the man that Riza would want to spend the rest of her life with. Was he?

The nurse continued to check his wounds for infection and to see how they were healing. He was snapped back to reality as she broke the silence. "I am sure a wonderful life awaits you at the end of your road to recovery." She smiled at him in a motherly way. With that she grabbed her chart and left the room. Not allowing him the chance to talk back.

He smiled to himself as he let her words sink in. He realized that he just couldn't live without the woman named Riza Hawkeye. He silently prayed that she would be there to help him travel down that road, although he inwardly felt guilty for doing so.


	3. Living

**Author's Notes:** I am sure most of you know what happened in the anime and what parts are from my story. But just so I feel better, this chapter is filled with things from the anime. I tried to keep the plagiarism at a minimum but there are some sentences that were just too important to leave out.

**Major overhaul completed on 6/12/07 chapter length more than doubled.**

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Living

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One month after Roy Mustang's release from the hospital found his still walking down the slow road to recovery. Riza Hawkeye had stayed by his side the entire time and she continued to do so even now. Once he was ready to be released she made all the preparations and came to stay with him at his place, Black Hayate in tow.

Riza sat in her chair close to his bed paring the skin off an apple. Her hair was cast down as was the look on her face. She sat lost in her musings as Roy quietly watched her work. On the outside his body had almost completely healed, but he was still terribly weak. He now wore a patch over the left eye that he lost when he was shot by Colonel Archer. It was a large patch that covered a good portion of that side of his face to hide the scars.

She was surprised when his quiet voice broke through her thoughts. "Don't look so gloomy."

She quietly regarded him for a moment before speaking. "Your plan was perfect. But because I didn't make it there in time…" She slightly paused.

He broke in before she could continue to blame herself. "There is no such thing as perfection. This world it's self is imperfect." He moved his hand towards her shoulder and gently touched her hair. She quickly moved her eyes there and back to his face. "That's what makes it so beautiful." He had a loving look on his face and she knew those words were directed to her.

She made a quiet acknowledgement to his words and almost had to smile. Quickly using her only defense she shoved an apple slice into his mouth that was perched on the end of her knife. One would think after all this time that she would be ready to accept such an advancement from him.

Roy jumped a little at her response to his attempt to tell her how he felt. In defeat he had to laugh inside as he took a bite of the apple. Black Hayate raised his head to see what was going on only to flop it back down for another nap when he realized it was nothing interesting. Things went quiet again as they silently enjoyed the comfort of knowing they were together.

Add one more week to his recovery and you would find it to be the loveliest day outside. Riza needed to go to the market and she thought today would be a great chance for Roy to get some fresh air. She was still on leave from the military so that she could care for Roy. He had made so much progress but he was still fairly weak and he needed a cane to support himself when he walked. There was nothing like exercise to help build up those muscles again, Riza told him.

Although Roy did want to recover he also couldn't help but think maybe it would be nice not to. After all, if he recovered he wouldn't need Riza's constant care and companionship. It was going to be quite lonely at his place once Riza and Black Hayate were gone; maybe he still had time to do something about it.

The market was filled with the normal hustle and bustle of daily shoppers. The sky was mostly clear with a very few puffy clouds that would drift by lazily. The sun shone brightly and the temperature was absolutely perfect for taking a walk. Riza, Roy, and Hayate looked just like a family as they strolled along looking at the many food vendors. Riza couldn't help but feel like a married couple as that very thought crossed her mind. It gave her butterflies to think that the strangers they met might think he was her husband. She only wished.

Stopping by a fruit stand Riza checked over the many types of apples displayed before her. Roy gazed at her from behind, Black Hayate faithfully at his side. He was delighted that they could share such a simple moment together. It really was a nice feeling indeed. Roy took in the sights and sounds of the market as he waited for his First Lieutenant. No, that wasn't right, Riza. They looked more like lovers right now than the Colonel and his subordinate. This was the way he wanted things to be, the way he had wanted them for so long now.

Riza turned to him from examining the apples her face displaying one of much happiness. He gave her a slight smile as he felt the pains of the past lifted from his shoulders at such a simple joy. Looking at her this way, he just couldn't help but think everything was going to be alright now. He was so close to allowing himself the luxury of the normal life he likely would never feel he deserved. But still, he wanted her so much. He wanted her to stay by his side not only in this time to heal but for always.

After purchasing some fruits and other foods from the vendors they continued on with their walk. Carrying her bag with Black Hayate on one side and Roy on the other she found pure bliss. She reveled in the feeling of this "normal life". A life away from the military and all the hardships it had brought them. Although she was fond of her guns, she never liked aiming them at a living, breathing target. She only did so to protect him. It was what she had to do to fulfill her pledge to watch his back and make sure he did not stray from his path.

By time their walk brought them back to the place they all currently called home it had become late after-noon. Riza urged Roy to lie down and rest while she got started on dinner. It was the first time they had spent so much time away from home since his injuries and she didn't want him to overexert himself. He tried to protest and had wanted to help her out in the kitchen but she insisted and he thought it wise not to argue with her.

The evening sun set found them quietly eating dinner at their usual small table in the kitchen. Roy's voice broke through the silence in a low and quiet manner. "Riza, can you ever see yourself having a life outside the military?"

Riza stopped all action and gently placed her fork on her plate. Her eyes were wide with surprise. "What was that?"

Roy held her gaze for a moment before he continued. "Could you see yourself settling down and getting married? Staying home and having children?" He paused slightly and she found no voice to answer him, she could only give him that same surprised look. He continued. "Would you marry someone like me? Could someone as unworthy as I make you happy?

"Roy…" Riza still couldn't believe what she was hearing. Something almost seemed wrong with this picture. She had no complaints at the thought of marrying Roy. Hell, she'd love to! But the look in his eye told her that something was dreadfully wrong. What had brought this on all of the sudden?

"I…" She was having problems with her words, but she had to get this out. She didn't want him to misunderstand. He was her everything. She lived for him! "You know that I would follow you anywhere." Her words were low, but still reached his ears. "If you were to quit as well, I could see myself happy with you. Just the two of us and Black Hayate." She gave a sincere smile as she thought of how happy she had been today with that very image.

"But…" There was that word that was hard to get around, she continued. "As long as you remain in the military, I will too. If we are to serve in the military I will always serve under you. To be there for you, to protect you. To do my job until the day I die. That is all I can be for you right now."

"I was afraid you would say something like that." His tone was grim, like he was getting ready for yet another funeral. "I don't want you in danger any more. I can't stand the thought of losing you. Losing Maes was…." Tears threatened the only eye of his she could see but he quickly recomposed himself and skipped on to what else he had to say. "I can't quit yet. I know that the position of Fuhrer is something I can no longer attain. But maybe I can still reach my goal. If such a position no longer exists then did we still accomplish what we set out to do?" He looked at her with pain and confusion and she felt every word of it.

"I think the answer is... yes." She spoke with a bit of confidence surrounding her words. "You set out to make changes to the way this country is led. The position of our "one" leader is now gone and the decisions are now made by the people. In the end, don't you feel that you have reached your goal just the same?" She had just answered his question with yet another question. But he understood what she meant. It all made sense; he just needed to hear her say it for it to really sink in.

"But there are so many sins that I still need to atone for. How can I do that now? By dedicating myself to that position I could have accomplished so much more." This time the tears did more than threaten. So much guilt was piled upon his shoulders that she was surprised it hadn't crushed him completely in all these years.

Riza stood from the table and approached him; gently she wrapped her arms around him pulling his face to her chest. Fighting hard not to let tears fall herself she composed her voice to be strong as she could muster. "I think that if you go back and do the job you have always done, Colonel, that that would be enough."

After a few moments she felt as though his sadness might be under control. She delicately removed his now encircled arms from around her waist and placed a kiss on his forehead. "Why don't you go get ready for bed, it's been such a long day for you. I will clean up the dishes."

She was glad he had waited until they were done with their meal before he started up this conversation. Neither one of them would have been in the mood to eat after getting so emotional. If only he could let go of all that guilt. Yes, there had been a lot of killing in the past and he was responsible for many deaths. But so were many other soldiers and it was more than time to rejoin the world of the living instead of living in the world of the dead.

After cleaning up the dishes Riza retreated over to the bed where Roy was now laying stretched out on top of the blanket. He was laying face down with his hands beneath his face, elbows out to his sides. As she approached to check on him he tuned his pain filled eye towards her. She sat on the edge of the bed next to him and rubbed his back in soothing motions. She tried to comfort him the best she could and told him getting depressed wasn't going to help anyone and that he needed to let the past go.

She started to talk about the many positive things that had started to take shape since the fall of the Fuehrer. As she had done many times before she coaxed him to let go of his guilt about Ishbal, they were all used by the military. Actually, the whole military were the ones being used by those whose greed outweighed the many lives that were sacrificed for their cause. Because of their personal sacrifices she guaranteed him that the whole world was now a better place. None of that would be possible if it weren't for him. After talking for a while she noticed a bit of the spark of determination returned to his eye. He rolled over and sat forward, leaning right into her now startled face. "Thank you." It was low and almost desperate sounding as the words left his lips. Then he leaned into her completely and pressed those lips on her own.

It was a flood of emotion like she had never felt before. Her heart raced and her mind swam, or actually it felt more like it was drowning. She had been here over a month with him and this was the first time he had ever been this close to her for something other than needing help to get up from the bed. What was more, through all the years she severed under him and the month and a half of living with him, not once did he try to claim her sweet lips before this.

The feeling was always there, oh yes, they both knew it. It was why he could so casually ask her about her future plans and if he was a part of them. Their love had only been unspoken, that didn't mean it wasn't there. It had been there all along. It was there when she protected him from scar in the rain that day and he knew. It was there when she stood by his side at Maes funeral and once again endured the rain with him. He had known that time as well. It was also there when a rock struck her in the forehead when they went to Ishbal to find Scar. He had paused as the chaos had started to take hold, only broken from his trance by the image of her hurt and bleeding. He acted cold towards her at that time. But she knew as well. She knew that he loved her and a battle raged within him to not express it on the battlefield.

It had always been there, kept in the shadow where others could not see it. It was love that was there through all those times of war and conflict, during missions and quiet times. It was love that caused her to protect him from the misunderstanding of others. It was love when she told Winry she was only in the military to protect someone. It was love when she was jealous of that nurse that had tried to flirt with him right before they left for the Fuhrer's mansion.

They never spoke it to each other, they didn't have to. They both held it in their hearts and felt the same. That love came crashing down around Riza that night she found Roy's lifeless form on the steps of the Fuhrer's mansion in a puddle of blood. Her cries wracked her body and reverberated though Roy's soul as he lay beneath her. Although he was unconscious he could still hear her wails and it made his heart break. He had made her cry. For that he could never forgive himself.

Now after all this time, he no longer wanted it to be unspoken. He had had enough of loving her from the shadows. He wanted to touch her, taste her, and feel her close to his own body. He had always needed her, wanted her, he couldn't wait any longer. Pulling her even closer, he deepened the kiss. She could only comply, reaching around his body and pulling him closer to her own body. His hands touched her curves, like a blind man feeling his way he ran his hand up and down her sides and to her strong hips. He caressed her and reveled in how soft her body was despite her strength.

His hands slowly reached for the buttons on her shirt. She said nothing as he slowly undid them one by one, sliding it off of her frame. He broke the kiss for a moment to speak. She gazed into his eye and saw his want and need for her. She couldn't resist either. "Just for tonight." He whispered. "Tomorrow, I shall contact Central and request a meeting. I will return to my former duties and do all that I can." The passion was coming back into his eye and his voice.

"I will be right there by your side." She smiled at him, happy to see traces of the man she had once known.

"Even if it's just for tonight…" Roy's voice trailed off as he repeated these words.

"Just for tonight" Riza repeated. She displayed love and longing on her own face. "Everything I have is yours. I love you."

Roy felt his heart tighten in his chest at the sound of her words. How long had he waited to hear her say that to him? "I love you too, Riza."


	4. Moving Forward

**Author's Notes: **Added some new content as of 6-13-07. This chapter is still too short so I might go back and work on it again in the future. If you have any ideas for improvements or if something doesn't seem right please let me know.

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**Moving Forward**

As promised Roy contacted headquarters the next day to express his desire to come back to work. Now the time was at hand and Roy stood before the court of Generals that would decide if Roy was suitable to return to active duty. He stood there well composed as they looked over the documents before them. He had been injured in the line of duty when Colonel Archer went berserk. Or so that was the story that was concocted to explain his many injuries. Although that was true, he had more injuries than just Archer could have inflicted.

There were some who were suspicious as to what exactly happened the night the Fuhrer's mansion went up in flames. Roy Mustang was supposed to be elsewhere that night so why was he not on the assignment he was given. According to a report filed by Lieutenant Hawkeye there were suspicions of treason in the ranks and there fore the need for the secret mission they were on.

She did not know the full extent of Archer's involvement since he had been killed in the ensuing fight. Thankful for a connection Roy had with a military doctor he had served with in Ishbal they were able to hide the nature of many of Roy's injuries. Surely the brass would question the massive wounds that could only have been made by a sword. He was reported to have broken ribs, lung damage, and facial trauma due to gunshot wounds.

Lieutenant Hawkeye who had been separated from the Colonel in the chaos was able to take Archer by surprise and had no choice but take him out. An extensive search of the Mansion turned up no trace of the Fuhrer. His son Selim was discovered on the front steps of the mansion apparently another victim of Archer's psychotic rage. Given what evidence could be found and what few witnesses that were still alive there was no choice but to believe all that was written in Hawkeye's report.

"Tell us something Colonel Mustang. Is it true that First Lieutenant Hawkeye stayed by your side the whole time you were on leave for your injuries?" The glare of one of the generals bore through him as the question came out more like an accusation.

"I don't know if I would use the term "the whole time". But yes, Riza was there attending to my needs and caring for my wounds. We were both on leave for injuries at the time. She was helping me out as a friend." Roy spoke with a passion that said he wouldn't back down.

"Either way I see you have requested your previous position as well as the subordinates that followed you. In light of your "_relationship"_ I don't see how you can expect us to reinstate you with your previous subordinates in a situation like this. With your reputation I am sure it's something more than what you are letting on. Surely you can't expect us to believe you won't show favoritism to the woman you've been sleeping with." General Hakuro spoke this time, acting like the big shot he thought he was. "The rules specifically state that a commanding officer is not to be romantically involved with his direct subordinates."

How shallow people like Hakuro really are. Only seeing what was on the surface and that which people spoke about. He really had no idea what kind of man Roy really was. All Hakuro cared about was gaining power for his own personal goals, to make himself feel important. Most likely he thought Mustang was the same way. A shallow person who would use others any way he saw fit.

"Now, now gentlemen." It was General Grumman that spoke up next. "Let's not jump to conclusions. I think you are all making too big a deal out of this. If his subordinates are still fine with working for him then we should let them decide for themselves. Lieutenant Hawkeye has devoted her career to serving under Colonel Mustang. Do you want to risk losing such a superb officer by reassigning her somewhere else? You should all be so lucky if you ever have a subordinate that is as loyal and devoted as she is." He gave Roy an approving look and Roy gave an inner sigh of relief for his support. The General gave a slight nod and a slight smile at the young Colonel. At least they had a strong and supportive ally. Riza's grandfather was a good man.

General Grumman was well respected and no one had any idea that the Lieutenant in question was actually his beloved granddaughter. The session then continued as the Generals once again looked at the files before them. At various times different ones would shake their head in approval or disapproval. Then everyone fell silent as the lead general cleared his throat to speak.

"Then it is settled. The field status of Brigadier General is here by removed and we reinstate you as Colonel Roy Mustang. Return to your post and your prior duties. Your former subordinates will all be reassigned to you if they so choose." The General's voice reverberated in the large room. "Dismissed."

Roy gave a silent salute to the Generals before him, followed by a curt bow before he excused himself from their presence. "Please excuse me then."

He once again opened those large heavy doors to see her nervously waiting for him on the bench across the way. She impatiently twisted her hands in her lap. As soon as the doors moved she stood quickly and crossed to him. This all seemed so very familiar, like they were reliving an event from the past.

"Sir." She addressed him, remembering to keep her professional manner. She had been calling him Roy for two months now. She silently prayed she could remember to now call him Colonel.

Roy could only smile as this all felt so nostalgic to him. Next he presented that age-old question that he never really had to ask. "Will you follow me once again, Lieutenant?" A knowing smirk tugged at the corner of his lips.

"You already know the answer Sir." She could do noting but reflect that smile back at him; making sure to add something more for good measure. "I will follow you anywhere."

With that they turned down the hall and walked on toward that familiar place. The office where once again they all would be the military "family" they had once been.

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**Author's Notes: **Ok, to explain a couple of things. General Grumman is the general that Roy is playing chess with in episode 26 in the TV series and Chapter 25 in the manga. He was confirmed in one of the Japanese publications to be Riza's grandfather. He has been seen in the manga offering his granddaughter's hand in marriage to Roy.

Field status- Brigadier General: I figure a lot of people might not pick up on this one so here it is. Toward the end of the series Roy is promoted to Brigadier General by the Fuhrer when he was being sent to the conflict on the boarder. During Winry's epilogue she refers to him as "Brigadier General". I figure they would remove that status when they put him back in his old position.


	5. Telling Her Goodbye: Ch 1

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist.

**Author's Notes:** Ok, this starts the second Arc of the fic. I am going to rename the title, so please be on the look-out for a name change. I had intended for these to be separate stories and I don't feel that "A Time to Heal" is a good title as a whole. I have a few titles in mind, please check out my fourm "Momiji's FMA Forum" (in the Fullmetal Alchemist Forum section)to give me your opinion on what it should be. It's under the topic of "Momiji's Fics".

Here is your warning, more spoilers for the end of the TV series are in this chapter. Please review and give an opinion on the new name (check the forum for that).

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**Telling Her Good Bye: Chapter 1**

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Colonel Roy Mustang sighed as he pushed back in his chair, dropping his pen onto the desk. He had had enough of this paperwork and he was ready to go home. He was tired and felt unsettled. So many things ran through his head that he just couldn't sort them all out.

He had been back to work for six months now. Things were very much the way they had always been. Lieutenant Hawkeye sat at her desk busy with her own paperwork. As were Lieutenant's Havoc and Breda, Sergeant Feury, and Warrant Officer Falman. There wasn't a single hesitation when each one was asked if they would serve under Colonel Roy Mustang again.

Roy's mind wandered out of control. Why did he deserve such loyal and dedicated subordinates? If they were just trying to help reach his goal so that things would change then why are they still here? The position of Fuhrer no longer exists. What now is their common goal?

It had bothered him more and more lately. Questions like these as well as the guilt of blood on his hands were running him ragged. And then to make matters worse there was Riza.

After his fight with the Fuhrer she took care of him and nursed him back to health. She cooked for him, changed his bandages, and stayed by his side. Just before coming back to work she even shared his bed with him a few times.

Now it was almost as if nothing had ever happened. Sure, she was still under his command and he saw her every day. But he longed to touch her and feel her warm skin. He wanted to let her know how much he appreciated all she did for him.

But he could not fault her for keeping her distance. He knew she did it for his own good. She had to do it for herself as well. The walls have eyes, nosey ones at that. Who knew when or where one of General Hakuro's lackeys would turn up.

He would never forget that day when Lieutenant Havoc came to his desk with what he had just learned. He was chatting with one of the secretaries when he overheard a nearby conversation. General Hakuro had a couple of subordinates who were keeping an eye on the Colonel and his first Lieutenant. Any hint of improper behavior between the two and he would make sure Riza was reassigned. There was even a hint he would try to have her reassigned to his own command. Surely it was just to spite him.

The General didn't have any evil intentions. He just didn't like Roy. He never had. He always saw him as an upstart and he didn't know that Roy actually had good intentions. He just wanted to knock him down a couple of pegs. Take some wind out of his sails.

It didn't really matter to Roy though. Seems most of the generals didn't care for him. He was just too young for his stature and position. He was used to it and just always made sure to watch his back. So he surrounded himself with people he could trust.

But with all that had come to pass things hadn't gotten any easier for Roy and his group. They were just lucky they were able to hide the facts about the disappearance of the Fuhrer. No one ever found out he was really a Homunculus, save for those involved with Roy's plan. And for as many enemies as he had it was a relief that no one knew that Roy had killed him.

The witnesses to the ordeal had been killed by Archer, or the Fuhrer himself. The Fuhrer's wife and the soldiers had been killed by Colonel Archer. Much to his chagrin he wasn't able to catch Lieutenant Hawkeye. Bradley's son escaped in the confusion and made his way to the mansion. It was there that Bradley killed the boy he had adopted for being "foolish". He had brought the skull with him, giving Roy the ultimate weapon.

It was something that had to be done, but regardless it didn't sit well with Roy. Was there no way to get away from the killing? King Bradley had manipulated so many wars just for the benefit of making a Philosopher's Stone. So many people died such meaningless deaths. The removal of King Bradley was something that had to be done. Just the same it only added to the pain that Roy felt in his heart.

So now, here he was. Sitting at his desk with the shadows of the past hovering over him. His recent comfort taken away by a selfish General who saw Roy as nothing but an upstart and a threat to the ranks.

"Sir…. Sir" The voice broke through his self absorbed musings.

"Huh?" Roy snapped back to reality.

"It's time to go home Sir." Riza stood before his desk a concerned look on her face.

"Oh. Thanks." Roy seemed a little out of it.

"Are you ok, you have been unusually quiet today?" Riza's concern showed in the tone of her voice.

"I'm fine, I was just thinking." Roy stood from his desk and moved to get his coat.

"Please let me know if you need anything, Sir." With that Riza turned and left the office. Roy's pained eyes followed her movements out the door.

'_What I need is something you can no longer give me. Nor can I ask you to_.' Roy thought to himself as he closed the office door behind him.

The bed sheets twisted around his body like the noose around a hanged man. They held him down despite his desperate struggle. A sheen of sweat formed on his furrowed brow, a result of his torment.

Everything was burning all around him. Everywhere he looked it was a sea of orange-red flames. The air smelt of burning flesh and wood, and was thick with ash. Everything was burning and it was all because of him.

Images of bloodied and broken bodies plagued his mind. Men, woman, and children, people of all kinds. The strong, the weak, the sick, and the healthy. There was no discrimination between one or the other. They all had to die.

"Why!" Roy screamed out into the burning heat. "Why do so many people have to suffer, have to die, to satisfy just one person's desires?" He questioned to the inferno received no vocal reply. But instead was answered with the topping of buildings, now crashing down around him. One such building was closer than the others and it only took him a moment to welcome his end.

Roy Mustang awoke with a start. Sitting bolt upright, the tangled sheets still wrapped around his body. He breathed in and out heavily as if he had been running. He brought a hand to his face as if he were looking for comfort. After a minute he wiped the sweat from his brow and flopped back down, his head cradled by the pillow.

The nightmares of Ishbal were becoming more and more frequent. Again. He couldn't clearly remember when they had actually stopped the first time. But he remembered at some point they seemed to have let up. But for the past three weeks they had once again plagued his slumber.

In the same way during most of his waking hours an image of Riza danced in his head. He was tormented by his conflicting emotions when it came to her. He longed to be with her but circumstances demanded they keep their distance. He couldn't help but start to think it might be for the best. He wanted so much more for her. Things he couldn't give her. She deserved much better than his blood stained hands.

It was still a couple of hours before he needed to get up, but he knew sleep would no longer be his friend. Deciding that a hot relaxing shower was in order he made his way to the bathroom. The hot water was soothing to his aching body but it could do little for his aching heart. His thoughts were still drifting off to Riza. He needed the comfort of her warm embrace right now. A comfort he knew he would never have again.

Roy was at the office an hour and a half before usual. Submerged in paperwork he didn't even notice the others filtering in.

"Colonel, Have you been here since last night?" Havoc's voice interrupted his current train of thought.

Roy looked up at the man with an unlit cigarette hanging from his mouth. "No, I just got here early today." Roy went back to his paperwork. For some reason he was looking forward to lunch today.

The cafeteria was the same as always. Officers scattered at tables here and there. Idle chitchat filled the air with the things gossipers love to hear. Roy decided he wasn't in the mood for such an atmosphere today, so he figured he would take his lunch back to his desk. That was until something caught his ear.

A couple of officers were talking about a memorial service that was to be held for the older man that was posted at the Northern Outpost. Seems he was due to retire in just one more year but had just suffered a life ending heart attack. This left the Northern Outpost without someone to oversee it. Central Headquarters had sent someone to cover the position until someone permanent could be found.

"Good luck finding someone." The sarcasm could clearly be heard in the man's voice.

"Yeah, who the hell wants to be up in that frozen wasteland?" The other guy questioned.

"No kidding." The first guy responded. "But this does present a problem."

"Huh?" The other man looked puzzled.

"If they don't find someone it will leave our Northern border unprotected. People's lives could be in danger if it isn't taken care of." The other man shook his head at the possibility of danger. "No one is going to want to do it. There's just nothing there, its no place fit to live in. It's more like punishment than a duty."

_'A punishment huh?'_ With that thought planted in his head, Roy Mustang left the cafeteria.


	6. Telling Her Goodbye: Ch 2

**Author's Notes:** Well, I am having a hard time with that new name. Nothing seems to really work well. So for now, I guess I am going to stick with "A Time to Heal". I just felt the title didn't represent this part of the story. But maybe it still does, since now it is a time for emotional healing.

I have changed Eastern Outpost to Northern Outpost. Seems I had a bad sub and it was mislabeled. I always thought that was odd that Eastern didn't seem snowy like that, but I didn't really put thought into it. Also, the old man that was stationed there is something I made up. He isn't anyone in the series.

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**Telling Her Good Bye: Chapter 2**

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Two days later- General's Assembly

"So Colonel Mustang, it appears that you have put in an application for a transfer to the Northern Surveillance Outpost." One of the stern looking generals spoke as he looked over his paperwork.

"That is correct sir." Roy's voice was steady and even.

Another general broke in. "That seems rather absurd. We can't waste resources like that. Sending a Colonel to do the job of a Corporal, ridiculous."

Roy spoke up in light of the argument that was put forth. "Then with all due respect sir, please demote me to Corporal."

"You can't be serious!" Another general could not contain his shock at the very thought.

"Are you sure about this Colonel?" The calm and steady voice of General Grunam could now be heard.

"I want to do something for my country that makes a difference. Currently I am no good to anyone here in Central. I feel that I could best serve the people by taking the job at theNorthern Outpost." The Colonel's voice was cold and distant.

"I see." Was all that came out of the mouth of General Grunam.

"Well I personally don't have any problems with this." General Hakuro was all too eager to get Roy permanently out of the picture.

"All right then, does anyone have a problem with the demotion and transfer request?" There was no answer to the question. "Alright then, we hereby demote Colonel Roy Mustang to the rank of Corporal. Effective immediately. Your transfer has been approved, you will leave first thing tomorrow morning. Dismissed."

With that the Generals disbanded for the day and Roy excused himself from their presence. On his way out the door a gentle hand touched his shoulder.

"I really do wish you would have reconsidered. And here I thought you really were going to take my granddaughter's hand in marriage." The kindly old General sounded slightly remorseful.

"My apologies General Grunman. If it were not for her I would be dead now, I owe my life to her. That is also why I cannot stay with her. She deserves someone much better than I. I cannot bare to touch her with these blood stained hands." The pain and sadness of a man who had seen too much death and suffering spoke clearly.

"So that's how it is. But she is a strong woman, do you forget that she also has that same blood on her hands." The General's words rang through with truth.

"Whydo you think it's any different?" Because she wields a gun and you use your alchemy? Killing is killing. It makes no difference how. There was a war and you both are soldiers. What's done is done. You both deserve to live your lives now. Put the past where it belongs." The General's words were full of wisdom and truth, but Roy had already made up his mind.

"I'm sorry." Those were the only two words he could find. Roy lowered his eyes as he slightly bowed his head toward the man. Turning on his heel he started to walk away.

"Promise me, once you find what you are looking for that you will come back to her. I know she will be waiting. I think you know that too." With that the old General closed his eyes and sighed.

It was after hours and Roy thought everyone had gone home for the day. He sat at his desk, quietly sifting through the drawers. There were very few personal effects. A picture of him and Hughes as well as one with Hughes family, Glacier and Elisiya. A couple of books, some personal notes, and a spare pair of gloves. That was about it. The rest of the desk was filled with files and official paperwork.

Roy took these items and started placing them in a small box. Stopping for a moment to regard the picture of himself and Hughes. Just as he was placing the photo in the box he heard the door to the office close quietly behind someone.

Riza now stood before his desk, the look in her eyes betrayed her emotions. She was shocked and surprised at the sight of Roy cleaning out his desk. "Roy." She started out, calling him by name for the first time in months. "What's happening?" She sounded very concerned.

Of all things he had ever had to do, at this moment he thought this was the hardest that's why he hadn't even planned on telling her. He had worked everything else out. Everything that was except for telling her goodbye. He though if he just disappeared she might handle it better. Or maybe it was just himself that he was thinking about making it easier on.

He looked at her face, as if to burn the image into his memory so he would not forget. But how could he? Whatever happened throughout his life, there was no way he would ever forget the woman named Riza Hawkeye.

"I have been reassigned to theNorthern Outpost." He didn't think there was any way he could sugarcoat it.

"What! How could they do that!" Riza's eyes burned with anger.

"They didn't." He gave a slight pause to her puzzled look. "I requested it."

Her look of surprise was quickly replaced by one of pain. She fought hard to keep the tears she felt gathering, at bay. "Why?" She chocked out, her voice soft and fragile.

"I'm sorry Riza. There just isn't anything here for me to do. I still want to make a difference. I can never make up for all the things I have done. But..." Roy's speech was interrupted as Riza's voice cut him off.

"Why do you still try to shoulder all the burden after all this time?" Her sad voice cut into him like a knife. He was trying to do what he thought was best. What was best for everyone, but instead he only brought her more pain. "I will go with you." She added her declaration.

"No." His answer came out flat and unyielding. "Besides, your transfer would never be approved."

"Then I will quit and go on my own." She wasn't going to back down to him. She couldn't let him do this alone. Why, why did he have to keep torturing himself. Ishbal, killing Winry's parents, his fight with the Fuhrer. He held all of it upon himself, living in a life wracked with guilt.

"I don't want you to come." He looked away from her, no longer able to meet her gaze.

She sighed deeply, her shoulders heaving. "I would expect you to say that." She knew nothing she could say or do could change his mind. "Please, at least let me help you pack. We can have dinner."

"Alright." How could he refuse her? After all that has happened she still stood by him. It was her choice. One which he thought he would never fully understand. Why him? He didn't deserve her devotion. That was all he could think.


	7. Telling Her Goodbye: Ch 3

**Author's Note:** Sorry for the dealy. I got wraped up in other projects (like getting my work done!). So, without further delay...

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**Telling Her Good Bye: Chapter 3 **

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The only sounds to be heard were the sounds of coat hangers moving and drawers opening. Quietly Riza Hawkeye helped her superior officer, Roy Mustang pack up his few belongings. The bulk of it was made up of military uniforms and books. What was left were a few sets of personal clothes, a few personal items, some pictures, and the bare necessities of kitchen ware.

It didn't take too long to pack everything up. Riza placed the last book from the shelf into a box. Closing it up, she double checked to make sure she hadn't missed one. Satisfied that there was nothing more she could do she decided she would go back to her place and start dinner.

"I think that about does it." She broke the long silence. "I'm going to go back to my place and get dinner started." She waited for him to acknowledge her. "By the way, where are you staying tonight?" She once again waited for an answer. Roy remained quiet as he moved some things around in a box.

She suppressed a little sigh and continued. "You are welcome to stay with me and Black Hayate tonight. He really misses seeing you and I'm sure he wants to say goodbye."

Roy turned from his box and finally replied. "Thank you. I will be over shortly."

Riza nodded her head in approval and exited the apartment. She was still angry that after all this time Roy wouldn't let her fully into his heart. She only prayed that tonight was one she could always remember with fondness in her own heart. She didn't want to lose sight of all the good times they had recently shared.

Dinner was a quiet affair. Like a silent vow had been made, neither one of themspoke. In some ways it was driving Riza crazy, there was so much she wanted to say. But she was afraid to speak. She didn't want to interrupt dinner with partially shed tears. Silence was grand, or at least it allowed her to finish her dinner.

At the finish of the meal Riza cleared the table as Roy scratched Black Hayate behind the ears. Riza gave a sad smile as the dog soaked up the attention he would no longer receive from those same hands. Why did it have to be this way? Why couldn't he stay? She knew the answer, but it gave her no comfort.

"Shall we sit?" Riza having just finished the dishes motioned toward the sofa.

Roy just gave a nod and followed her away from the table. Now sitting on the sofa together, Riza decided it was time to face reality. "So… you really are going. It seems really hard to believe. I really wish you would have reconsidered." She couldn't hide the sad look on her face any longer.

Roy gave a slight smile as he spoke. "You know, your grandfather said the same thing to me."

"You saw my grandfather?" Riza looked a little surprised.

"The General was on the committee the day I was called in for my transfer request."

"I see." Riza was really feeling at a loss. She wondered how they had drifted so far apart over the last few months.

"Riza, I..." Roy stumbled to find his words, but they eluded him some how.

"Don't…" Riza's voice started out as a sharp command but then softened as she came to the end of the word. After a very slight pause she continued. "Please Roy, I want to remember the good times we have shared these past few months. Just hold me for now."

They sat like that for a while. Riza leaned into Roy's warm embrace and she allowed herself the pleasure of forgetting why they were there. The comfort enveloped them like a blanket on a cold day. Like their relationship had always been, they didn't really need any words.

And so it was. Without words Roy pulled Riza close to his body and cradled her in his arms. Moving off towards the bedroom where he gently laid her down. Still no words were spoken the rest of that night. Just the soft moans of pleasure from one side or another. That night would become the memory that would carry her through. A reminder of the love they sharedbut could never fully realize.

* * *

The next morning saw Roy crawling out of bed well before his usual time. Quietly he slipped through the darkness, trying not to wake Riza or a sleeping Black Hayate. Despite his best efforts there was no way Riza was going to let him sneak away. 

She watched him silently move towards the door where she quickly met him. The couple now stood face to face in a silent farewell. He wrapped his arms tightly around her and pulled her into a close embrace. As he pulled away he tenderly placed his lips upon hers for a farewell kiss.

Riza couldn't control the moisture in her eyes any longer. The welled up tears overflowed and ran down her flushed cheeks.

At that moment Roy Mustang hated himself more than he ever had. This was the second time he made her cry. This first time was something he had no choice over, but it still made him curse himself. This time, he had every chance to spare her these tears and he chose not to. Ultimately he felt this was for the best. There was more to life than himself and the military.

For a time he thought that he could live a normal life. If that was the case, he wanted that life to be with her. He could almost see them as a family. Black Hayate playing with the children was once a nice daydream. But the dreams turned into nightmares as their military life started to drive an invisible wedge between them and visions of Ishbal plagued his memories. Unseen phantoms cursed him in his sleep and threatened to take away those he loved. He was filled with so much guilt and pain he now feared anything but a life of solitude.

So here he stood. Saying goodbye to his one true love. She had been by his side for so long he didn't know how he was going to get by without her. He would have to deal with it. His own sake, as well as her's.

"Goodbye." It was all he could do to speak. Almost a whisper in the solitude of morning. He broke off the embrace and opened the door.

"I'll always be here waiting for you." Riza's voice cracked as she controlled her sobs. His body stiffened as she spoke, like he had been stabbed in the back with a dull knife. The door closed without another word. But she knew he had heard her.

Riza sunk down to the floor, onto her knees. No longer able to control her tears they soaked into her face as they made their way down onto her legs. Hiding her drenched face in the palms of her hands she now wept as hard as she had wept the day she thought he had been killed by Archer. No, that wasn't true at all. She cried even more than that,for that time she realized he was still with her.This time there was no ray of hope to be found. She cried until the tears would no longer come. Black Hayate nuzzled against her and whined for his master's grief. That was all he could do for her.

That day Roy Mustang walked away from Central and began his journey of self-exile. Surely his demons would follow no matter where he went. But Roy felt this was something he had to do. In no way could this make up for all the lives that he had taken in the past. But the longest journey starts with one step.

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**Author's Notes:** So that's it for this arc of the story. I actually wrote most of this ahead of time and kept adding and tweaking before I posted each chapter. The next part is going to be a bit of a struggle, I haven't done anything for it. I have to admit I am a little lacking in inspiration right now. I think my struggle shows up a little in this chapter, I don't feel it's as good as the others. I just don't know what it's lacking.

Not sure when I will get the next part done. I'll try not make everyone wait, I know I hate waiting myself. In the meantime if you haven't read some of my other FMA Roy/Riza fics please check them out. Getting reviews is very inspiring, a lot of times they help me find what I am lacking. "His Weakness" is in my opinion my best writing so far. My first FMA fic, "Stay With Me" is pretty romantic and a little angsty.

The next part of "A Time to Heal" will cover the events we see in the movie, and hopefully move beyond it. Till then, happy reading!


	8. Left Behind: Ch 1

**Author's Notes**: Wow, it's been a really long time since I have updated. Sorry about that. I've been real busy since winter ended. It's likely to be that way until we get close to winter again. This time of year is always busy with family activities and anime conventions (which I attend as a vendor, so it's actually part of my job).

I am afraid this chapter is nothing too exciting. Just some filler to flesh out the story a little more. It's mostly a look at past events that haven't already been covered in any of the other chapters. The next chapter will get us back to the present and hopefully closer to the end. If you have any ideas on how to make this better please let me know. I love getting constructive or inspiring reviews!

Left Behind

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Riza Hawkeye awoke to the cheerful sound of birds chirping and the soft glow of morning sun streaming across the foot of her bed. It was the same as it was every day when she awoke and got ready for work.

Each peaceful day had been the same since he had left her behind almost two years ago. Each day she would get ready for work and mindlessly go about her daily chores.

Life in the military without Roy Mustang had very little meaning for her. The man had been her life for almost fourteen years. Since the day she had met him, Riza knew that Roy would always be important to her.

In the beginning he was just her father's apprentice in alchemy. That was how it all started. After her father had passed away Roy had made sure she was taken care of and that she was kept safe. She was only fifteen at the time and her grandfather had been assigned far away from East City where they lived.

Upon his deathbed Riza's father had asked Roy to look after her. He would have done so without his asking. Riza was a sweet girl. She was quiet and a bit of a tomboy. She was good with a gun and her crack shot would make any sharpshooter in the Amestris army blush with embarrassment. She could out-gun them all.

She was a though little cookie and Roy was sure she didn't really need looking after. But her father was everything in her life. Her only other living relative that Roy even knew of was her grandfather. Life would be rough for a little while. Roy really wanted to help see her through it.

She was grateful to Roy and he made sure to keep in touch with her. Even after he became a State Alchemist he kept an eye on her from a distance when he could not do so in person. Maes was excellent at handling details and investigations. He had no trouble keeping tabs on the girl and she wasn't even aware of it.

Maes's updates on Riza's welfare as well as his ramblings about his new girlfriend were a welcome relief to Roy on the front lines. He looked forward to each letter he received as the war raged on. He was glad to see life from any other point of view.

When Riza found out that Roy had been sent to the front she was in a fit. Her father had taught Roy the secrets of his powerful and deadly alchemy so Roy could help people, not annihilate them.

Although she shared her father's discontent and lack of trust for the army she really saw no other recourse. Over the course of time she had realized that Roy would be used as a human weapon. He was really a kind soul with a kind heart. He just wanted to help people. That realization had become a cruel reality.

The military was always looking for people like him. People that could be used. Especially one like Roy, who wielded an awesome power. His alchemy had become quite powerful. He was sent to the front lines to fight for his country. To "protect" people. But who would protect him?

She was going to do it! No matter what it took she was going to be the one to protect him while he focused on protecting others. The army was in desperate need of sharpshooters. She would join up and no doubt be sent to the front because of her skill.

Now that she had decided on it. She would work hard and not rest until she was at her place by his side. And so it was. After six weeks of intense training and one more week of specialized training she was on her way to the front as a sniper. She prayed she wasn't too late. Roy Mustang was the type who would never think to watch his own back.

By the time she arrived the war was almost at an end. The fighting only dragged on for about two weeks more. But that time was two weeks she would never forget. The death and the stench of rotting flesh on the hot sandy battlefield left her sick and horrified.

The alchemists had not really come into play when she first arrived. Roy had been sent out only once to use his powerful fire. The ring he wore, given out by Colonel Basque Gran amplified his power even more. The first time he snapped his fingers had set an entire city block ablaze with a thunderous shock to the landscape.

After that time the alchemists were kept busy at the camp. They were given petty jobs to keep them busy until the time came when they would be sent in a mass to wipe what remained of Ishbal off the map.

At one point Gran had ordered Roy to execute the Rockbell doctors as traitors. It was an order he fought with protest. In the end he found himself too weak to fight the system and he gave in to the command.

Once the orders were carried out Roy trembled in disbelief. The kind husband and wife doctors lay in a thick pool of blood. The picture of a little blonde girl lay beside their bodies with a smear of crimson red across her precious little face.

Roy felt sick as he gasped for air. He felt like he was suffocating, on the stale air in the room. The room seemed to close in on him and the sounds of the gunshots wrung through the air.

Later he returned to the scene. The bodies were now gone and the evidence of that gruesome scene had been entirely removed. No blood. No picture of a little blonde girl. Just the small room of a clinic, devoid of everything but some sparse furniture. A small cot and the stool that stood upright by the desk against the wall.

Roy took in the scene before him. Despite his best efforts to drown reality in the bottom of a bottle he still felt the pain in his heart from the recent events. The bottle rolled away from him and across the floor. Leaving a thin trail of liquid as it went.

With trembling hands Roy grabbed his handgun from its holster and rammed it into the bottom of his chin. Before he could find the courage to pull the trigger Doctor Marcho stopped him and talked some sense into him.

He wallowed back to his tent and tried to shut out the world, burying himself under the dingy pillow and blanket. That was how Riza had found him, broken and abused by the military he had put so much faith in.

Riza had seen enough killing to last a lifetime in those few days she was there. But there was one death that would have brought her a sick satisfaction. Basque Gran. That man was a horrible monster, it was he who had sent Roy to exterminate the doctors like they were just insects.

Why? Why Roy? There were so many other men much more suited to the terrible task. He was ordered to shoot them. He wasn't even proficient with a gun! She was surprised he could even handle one well enough to kill someone. His forte lay in alchemy. Fire alchemy at that. It just didn't add up, something really stunk and Gran was at the root of it.

"Roy… Roy…. Roy please answer me." Riza's soft voice could be heard through the muffling of the thin blanket. "I came to protect you and that is what I am going to do!"

With that Riza yanked the blanket off of Roy leaving him nothing to hide behind. His face was sullen and his eyes were red and bloodshot. He smelled of alcohol and… was that death? Could such a thing emanate a smell from a person still living?

His face was haggard and looked an odd mix of young and old. The lines of worry and regret made him look thirty years older than he was. But still, you could see under that the unmistakable face of a very young man the age of twenty-one.

"Roy. You have to pull yourself together. Please! Remember you are here for the good of the people. There are those you must protect. While you focus on your mission I will be here to watch your back." Riza's voice pled with Roy to snap out of his self-destructive depression.

Roy finally looked Riza in the face. What she saw completely broke her heart. Seeing Roy this way was even harder than dealing with the battlefield.

"There was no one here to protect when I arrived. It was all just a lie. Like your father had warned me, I was only used as a human weapon. I was too stupid to listen. There is no way the Amestris army will ever allow me to help people. They just want me to destroy them." Roy's voice cracked a little as he spoke. His tone was that of a man who was utterly defeated. His face looked like it was inviting death to come for a visit.

"Roy, you must live. Live to become stronger so that next time you WILL protect the people. Maybe that isn't how it worked out this time. But there is always the future if you just live for it. PLEASE!" Riza sounded like a preacher preaching his convictions.

"Don't just take this laying down. Become stronger both in physical power and rank. Use everything you have to fight people like Gran and put and end to the suffering people like him needlessly cause."

* * *

Riza's powerful words and her devotion to him snapped Roy out of his guilt-ridden state. He wasn't quite the same happy young man she knew that had studied alchemy with her father. But he looked much more alive and no longer had the look of a broken man looking for a way to self-destruct.

That all changed when he went back to Central. All the soldiers were given a short leave to recuperate from the long battles of the war. Roy had holed himself up in his apartment studying alchemy theories about human transmutation.

When Maes found out he was livid. The punch in the face Roy received from his long-time best friend was kind in comparison to what he could have done. Maes was going to knock some sense into him, even if he had to do it literally.

In the end Roy admitted he was too much of a coward to take his own life. Something that no doubt would have been the end result of any such experiments of the alchemy taboo. Maes told him it was normal to be afraid of dying, everyone was like that.

Instead of dying he made a pledge with Maes that day. Maes told him to turn things around and make it his goal to change how things worked. He urged Roy to become a man that would prevent another Ishbal from ever happening again.

It was then that Roy told Maes he would do just that. "I am going to become Fuehrer and change all that is wrong with this world."

"And I will always be below you, pushing you up." Maes added to the pact.

Upon their return, those who survived the war were decorated as heroes. Especially Roy. As an alchemist he played a key role in the final battle. He was promoted from Major to Lieutenant Colonel and given an office at Central Headquarters. He requested Riza Hawkeye as his personal adjunct sighting her performance during the war as his motive.

Maes Hughes was the only one that knew Roy had studied alchemy under Riza's father. He planned to keep it that way too. Maes and Riza were the only two people he could trust his dream and new goal to. Once Riza was let in on Roy's new ambition she supported him wholeheartedly.

"I as well as Maes will always push you up from below. I will be here to serve under you and watch your back." Riza made this solemn vow to his face as well as her own vow to herself to protect the man she had grown to love.

This is something I decided on for myself. No one forced me to make this decision. I made it of my own free will and I vow to protect him no matter what, even at the cost of my own life.


	9. Left Behind: Ch 2

Chapter 2

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Riza was busy sorting the morning's paperwork when the office door opened. Sergeant Fuery entered the room as he removed his coat and hung it on the rack by the window. "Good morning Lieutenant!" He was cheerful and respectful as always.

"Good morning." Riza's reply was short but not rude she seemed to be a little lost in thought.

Fuery sat down at his desk as he surveyed the empty room. "Where is everyone this morning?"

"Falman is helping Scieszka move some stuff around in the records room today." Riza paused to take a sip from her glass of tea. "Havoc and Breda have the day off."

"That seems odd that they both have the day off today." Fuery couldn't hide the extremely puzzled look on his face.

"They had some place to go today." Riza tried not to put too much thought into it as she spoke. Maybe that was what tipped Fuery off there was more to the situation than she let on.

"Is it some kind of mission? I wonder what is up." Fuery didn't drop the matter.

"No." Riza figured she mind as well get it over with. "It's personal. They have gone to see the Colonel at the Northern Outpost." Riza never told any of them about Roy's demotion.

"The Colonel? How come you didn't go with them Lieutenant?" Fuery's question seemed innocent enough.

"They didn't ask me to accompany them." Riza's voice almost sounded sad in her reply. "They thought I wouldn't want to go given the circumstances. It's silly really… they thought I didn't know what they were up to. I know everything that goes on in this office." Her voice shifted to a slightly annoyed tone.

"Given the circumstances?" Fuery had another puzzled look on his face. "Is something wrong?"

"No." Riza sighed. "It's just because I served under Roy for a very long time. Only a fool would think it was an easy adjustment for me when he left. I guess they thought it would be hard for me to see him again."

Without realizing it Riza had actually called Roy by name. By the time she noticed it was too late to do anything about it. She wondered if Fuery even heard her.

"I guess I hadn't thought of that. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to trouble you." Fuery seemed all too eager to apologize about even bringing it up.

"It's ok, don't worry about it. I'm fine. That was a long time ago, it's over now." Riza smiled as she waved him off. She picked up her next piece of paper and started to write.

* * *

Riza was lost in her musings as she walked along the sidewalk that led to her apartment. In some ways she wished that Havoc and Breda had asked her to come along on their journey. On the other hand she was relived that she hadn't been presented with the choice. She hadn't seen Roy in so long she wasn't even sure what she would do. Even more so, she was worried how he would react. Several times she had been temped to run after him. But the thought of driving him further away was always at the back of her mind. That was the last thing she wanted to do. Especially since she knew he was hurting. But it hurt her even more that all she could do was sit and wait. So wait she did and wait she always would. The walk was now over as she entered the hall of her apartment building that led to her home of the past three years. Upon entering the door she was happily greeted by the only loved one she had left in her life, Black Hayate.

* * *

Roy sat in the dimly lit cottage by the cold and barren Northern boarder of Amestris. The fire raging in the fire place was the only source of light as he pondered what his next move would be.

There was trouble brewing in Amestris and Roy had a hunch that Fullmetal and the gate were both connected to the situation. Al was already on the move, his phone call to the Rockbell residence had turned up little information.

It was time. Roy readied himself for the journey back to Central. Although he was physically ready for his return he was unsure of his mental preparations. Even now the sins of the past still plagued his mind. Those phantoms were only overshadowed by his memories of his lover.

Her face haunted his dreams and he could often feel the heat of her soft flesh under his touch. He could taste her sweet lips with every kiss. He felt the rhythm of her heart beat with every caress. Then he would wake up.

It had been about two years since he had felt her touch or heard her voice. Two long years and yet he could see every curve of her body as if she were right there in front of him.

He doubted he could ever live without her. He had resolved to push her away for her own good. But after all this time he hadn't brought himself to move on himself. He highly doubted she had moved on either.

If she was still waiting for him upon his return he would not push her away again. He vowed that no matter what happened from now on they would be happy. They had lived through enough suffering. It was time to let the healing be complete. If they were together he believed they could overcome anything.

Roy Mustang closed the door of the small cottage and entered the barren snow covered wasteland. He pulled the collar of his coat closer to his face then shoved his hands deep into his pockets as he made his way to the train station.

"Wait for me." Roy's voice echoed out into the void. A statement he knew she could not hear but somehow felt she would know in her heart.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** Well, there it is another short chapter. Sorry it took so long I didn't have things ready ahead of time and I got busy with all the anime cons I attend.

I apologize that this chapter seems a little shallow. I haven't really thought of anything that could really improve it though. Maybe if more people would review I could find what it is that I am lacking…

Reviews really are appreciated as well as constructive suggestions. Thank you to those who have reviewed in the past. Please continue to do so. Just two more chapters to go!


	10. Left Behind: Ch 3

Left Behind: Chapter 3

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The situation looked grave indeed. Despite their best efforts, the armored invaders would soon overtake the last line of defense. Where they had come from or why they invaded became a secondary though. Right now the only thing on their minds was survival.

Riza aimed her sight on the one weak spot she could find. The ventilation slats on the front of the helmet were small, but her eagle eyes and skilled targeting more than made up for the challenge. She deftly placed a bullet right on the mark causing a sick splatter of bright red to spray out from inside. She then continued on, already in search of her next target.

The streets were full of panic as the people ran for their lives and cried out in utter fear. She could even hear the panic start to over take the ranks. Her comrades called out to each other trying to watch each other's backs.

They were closing in fast and there didn't seem to be any end to them. Things looked worse by the moment. Just then Armstrong came running into the battle with his muscles bared. In a flash he used his awesome alchemic powers and took out an entire row of invaders.

But this was too soon to celebrate. The armored warriors were now infiltrating them from the rear as well. Descending down the front of Central Command. It seemed that the end of the battle was close at hand. And the Amestris army looked to be on the losing side. For some reason that fact had not fully registered in the minds of all the soldiers yet. Riza and her comrades continued to fight valiantly, like it made a difference. It always had before. Surely fate would not abandon them at a time like this.

Just when the situation couldn't get any worse, suddenly there was an explosion. Riza's heart skipped a beat, like a young girl back in school. She felt like she was waiting to catch a stolen glimpse at one of her classmates. She waited and listened.

There it was… the snap of the fingers followed by the explosion and the eruption of fire. Then again. It had to be him. How or why she just didn't know. She just didn't care. All that mattered was that she had believed. She believed that she would see him once again. That belief gave her the strength to keep fighting, to keep living.

Everyone froze in anticipation, the battlefield fell silent except for the sounds of the snap followed by an eruption of fire. A stoic form became visible for all on the battlefield to see. Emerging from the flame and chaos amidst the armored bodies. Tall and proud, the figure walked with dignity and purpose. Snapping his fingers and clearing the way with a baptism of fire that was unleashed upon the soulless knights.

It became so quiet you could just about hear a pin drop. Jaws dropped and heads turned. The appearance of Roy Mustang brought joy to the faces of once desperate soldiers. The tide had now turned. Their miracle had arrived. The battle was not over, but some already felt like they had won.

Riza Hawkeye was one of those soldiers. Her heart continued to race and felt as though it would burst. So many emotions flooded her mind and soul. Joy, sorrow, relief, anger, excitement, all conflicting and constricting upon her heart. How so much could well up in one person she did not know. She felt as if she could die where she stood, and yet her heart grew wings and felt like it would soar.

He started barking commands at his former subordinates. They all outranked him now, but those that knew didn't even seem to even remember that. They all obediently complied and scurried to their given tasks. He continued his gait forward. Sending each man he came to on his way.

At last he came to the one remaining soldier left on the battlefield. The lean form of the soldier was like a statue. The utmost of respect shown through their body language. A salute at attention, that was how Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye now stood. Roy came to a stop a few feet in front of her and regarded her graceful from.

"We have been waiting for you." She said as something close to a smile broke onto her face. Despite all that had happened and the grave situation at hand she was happy. He was home. She wanted nothing more than to throw herself into his strong arms and cry herself dry. But that would have to wait for a time more appropriate. Right now there was a battle to be won.

"Are you still willing to follow me after all this time?" The question was accompanied with that old smirk and a fire in his eyes. Expressions of a Roy Mustang that she once had thought no longer existed.

"Do you really need to ask me that, Sir?" Her reply was sharp and witty. It was just like it had been in the past. Riza felt like she had stepped into a time warp where things had never changed.

"Let's go then Lieutenant!" Roy motioned for Riza to follow him as they made their way closer to the building.

Although the heat of battle was never a pleasant place, Riza almost felt in bliss. A gun in her hand, she shot down any threat that hadn't already fallen victim to Roy's flame alchemy. This moment was one she had long waited for.

For so long she had painfully felt Roy's absence. She missed serving under him as an officer almost as much as she missed serving him as she always had. As his protector, his confidant, his closest ally, and after all those years finally as his lover.

They made an excellent team, time had done nothing to diminish their chemistry. Riza was so lost in these long sought after moments that she scarcely noticed Roy leave her side.

By the time she was able to rejoin him he was already in the basket of the balloon that Armstrong and some of the officers had commissioned using the large banner that hung from the roof of Central Headquarters.

"Wait for me!" She cried out. Riza's swift run to catch up to him turned to panic as she realized he wasn't waiting for her. The balloon started to lift off the ground and it was already out of her reach as she prepared to make an impossible leap.

Her body heaved backwards at mid-lunge. A large and powerful arm swept around her small waist and restrained her from going any further.

"No way! You can't!" Riza cried out in disbelief as she realized her lover had once again left her behind.

"There is only room for one person with the power I must wield." Roy's voice grew smaller as the balloon lifted him farther out of her sight.

Riza just wanted to die at that moment. Not once but twice now, Roy Mustang had left her behind. How could the man she devoted her life and her heart to just leave her again like that? He had phrased it in a way that sounded nice. But really what he had just said is that she would just be in his way.

Armstrong finally let go of his hold as Riza tried desperately to regain her composure. She had gone through so much already. The pain and longing she had felt in the past had been just as sharp. Through it all she never had shown her weakness to her comrades. She wasn't about to let it happen today either.

Unshed tears never found their way down her cheeks. She stood tall and proud as she straightened her posture. The others had faith in Roy, she needed to show her faith as well.

"He'll be back. Don't worry. The spark has been lit once again. The man we all knew as Roy Mustang has returned and I don't think he will ever leave again." Armstrong spoke only the truth as he looked down into Riza's eyes, his hands on her shoulders.

"I know." Riza could only return Armstrong's gaze and give him a weak smile.

She felt in her heart that there was no way he would leave Central again. But still, the ache in her heart resounded with the knowledge that at this momenthe had once again left _her_ behind.

* * *

Armstrong was carrying the bodies of the fallen armored invaders, clearing away the waste and rubble from the now crumbling city. The flying ship broke free of it's hold and started to fly away. 

"Is it over?" Armstrong asked, although he lacked any kind of enthusiasm.

"Yes." Was all Riza could manage in a quiet voice. She surveyed the scene and lowered her gun, deciding the threat was now over.

Meanwhile up in the sky on the floating ship Edward was giving instructions to his crying brother to destroy the gate. He planned to return to the other side of the gate with the flying ship and to destroy that gate as well.

Mustang held back Al as Ed severed the ship from the large mass that the other two were standing on. Not willing to bear the burden with anyone else he planned to go back alone and of his own free will.

Al pled with Ed not to leave."Whatareyou going to do about Winry?" Al's voice was pained as the image of their childhood friend crossed his mind. All this time she has been waiting.

"Tell her I said thanks for this". He held up his arm and smiled sadly back to his brother. With that Edward turned his back and entered the ship.

"I will destroy the gate on this side." Mustang said with a smile to Alphonse.

Al nodded and Mustang helped give Al the boost he needed to make the jump through the air onto the ship that had started to drift away.

Roy was glad that Al could finally be reunited with his brother. They all had thought Ed was still alive, but where he had gone they just didn't know. Although the case seemed to be closed on this particular story Roy couldn't help but have a little regret in his heart.

That poor young girl had had everyone she had ever loved taken from her. Save the grandmother that had raised her since Roy himself had killed her parents by Colonel Gran's orders during the war. Ed and Al were like brothers to her, she had been waiting all this time for them to return. No matter how long she waited it now seemed her desire would never be fulfilled.

Her personality reminder him of another certain blonde woman he knew. That certain woman was devoted as welland waited endlessly for her love to return to her. At this point it was clear that she would accept no other. Would Winry do the same? Would she spend her life pining away for a love that would never return?

The severed piece of the flying ship drifted ever closer to the ground as Roy allowed himself those moments to be lost in though. What was he going to do now? After all that time he should have had it worked out. That was why he left, right? To work out his problems and make amends for the wrongs he had committed in his life. To pay for his foolish mistakes.

He hadn't planned to come back yet, so he had yet to resolve every issue. He had hoped that she would've given up on him by now. Maybe he even wanted her to hate him. Deep down he figured that would never come to pass. But still, it was an easy out and to want an easy out was human nature.

He had known this woman since she was still just a girl and he barely a young man. They had become close over time and her devotion to him was always very clear. He knew her so well that withjust one look in her eyes he knew she was still in love with him. Devoted as ever.

Roy felt like a coward. He felt he didn't deserve her and therefore hurt her in the process of doing "what was best for her". Removing himself from the picture, trying to make that choice for her.But was it really fair for him to decide such things when all it did was leave her alone in this world?

As the piece of the air ship collided with the ground Roy was jarred to his senses. His personal problems would once again have to wait. Right now there was a gate to destroy. One that held another world on the other side. A world where Ed and Al now resided and would be trapped forever.


	11. Left Behind: Chapter 4

Author's Note: Well here it is the last day of July and almost midnight. I had told some people I wanted to finish it by the end of July and it looks like I'm just going to make it! Please take the time to leave a review. I am interested in hearing what people think of the ending. Feedback is always good either way. Please leave lots of reviews so I can have new inspiration for my future writing (most likely this fall).

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Left Behind: Chapter 4

Epilogue

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One year has passed since the return of Roy Mustang, the Flame Alchemist. The now Brigadier General sat at his desk idly fingering the document he was reading. Paperwork was still one of his least favorite things in the world.

He stopped to survey the office, his eyes tired of all those jumbled letters on every page. The scene had not changed since the last time he had looked up. Havoc leaned back in his chair, a vacant look on his face. An unlit cigarette hanging from his lips. Furey's desk was still empty. He had gone out to fix the telephone at the receptionist's desk and had yet to return.

Falman had gone to the reference library to pick up some research documents. Like Furey he also had yet to return. The next desk over on the other hand was where Breda sat diligently filling out pages of the report he was working on.

Upon glancing at Hawkeye's desk Roy took in the sight of the woman with short black hair bent over her paperwork. It was no longer Riza's form that graced that place in the office with her presence. In her stead was another woman. Lieutenant Maria Ross. She had been transferred to this office shortly after Roy's return.

The office always felt empty to Roy without the presence of his lovely blonde subordinate. He missed her stern attitude when it came to paperwork and the occasional smile she would give him that brightened his day.

For these reasons and more, he always looked forward to the end of the day. More than he ever had before, he wanted each day to end so he could once again see that lovely smile. He would go home and embrace her slender form and inhale the wonderful scent of her golden hair. It was a different kind of life for both of them. But it was one that they were both enjoying to its fullest.

Upon his return there was still a lot of healing to be done. Not just for himself but for Riza too. Roy finally came to except that no matter what happened Riza would always wait for him and therefore he was only causing her to suffer by distancing himself.

Four months later they were married in the presence of their military family and friends. Although Maes Hughes was no longer with them they could feel his presence that day. That goofy grin could be felt by every person in the room as Elysia threw flower petals before Riza's feet.

It was Riza's grandfather that gave away the lovely bride. The kindly old general was all too happy to give his granddaughter away to her handsome beau. He had always had a liking for Roy and couldn't think of a better man for his dear little Riza-chan.

With this new life in front of her Riza decided to resign from the military. She left Lieutenant Ross to keep Roy in line, she had confidence she could handle the job. And handle the job she did. She was a stern but compassionate woman, like Hawkeye herself. She kept the boys on their toes but everyone liked her very much.

Roy sighed as his thoughts of Riza led him father away from his work.

"Is something wrong, sir?" Lieutenant Ross questioned as she looked up from Riza's old desk.

"No, nothing in particular Lieutenant. Just whishing I was home right now." Roy couldn't help but sound a little depressed.

"That's understandable sir. Please try to bear with it a little longer. We're half way there. It's lunch time." Lieutenant Ross went back to her paperwork.

Roy reached into his pocket and pulled out his State Alchemist's watch. Flipping open the lid he looked at the location of the hands. "So it is." Roy remarked out loud as he noticed the time read 12:05.

As if on cue the office door opened and in stepped a slightly heavy blonde woman in a light blue summer dress that fell just below the knees. In her hand she carried a brown lunch bag. At her heels followed a black and white dog with his head held proud.

"Well, well if it isn't Mrs. Mustang." Havoc spoke, now upright in his chair with his trademark grin on his face.

"How is everyone today?" Riza beamed as she made her way to her husband's desk.

"It was a little dull around here, until you showed up." Roy didn't do much to hide the smug look on his face as he looked his lovely plump wife up and down.

"Well, I'm glad I can still be of use around the office." She smiled warmly. "Sir." She couldn't help but add for old time's sake. She then deposited the lunch bag on Roy's desk and gave him a wink.

"How are you feeling Riza?" Lieutenant Ross looked up from her desk. The place where Riza had sat for so many years.

"I'm feeling pretty good lately. Now that I am finally over the morning sickness bit." Her face twisted a little bit in thought and she made a frown. "Morning sickness, HA! More like all-the-time sickness."

"So are you finally able to eat?" Ross ventured to ask.

"Oh yes, and it's a very good feeling. I actually lost 10 pounds in the first 3 months! But now I am gaining quite well as you can see." She made a motion across her swollen tummy that protruded out under her lovely dress.

With only 2 months to go Riza couldn't wait to get this whole experience over. Although it brought her great joy that she was having a child with the love of her life it hadn't been all that pleasant an experience.

She was often in pain and very uncomfortable. The first 5 months she was so sick she could hardly eat. At least that part was over and she was doing well on that aspect these days. But what she hated most was not being able to do everything for herself.

She was told not to lift anything heavy or do anything too strenuous. The doctor warned her to be extra careful because of her age. Although she still considered herself to be young it was preferred that women do their child baring before the age of 30. She was now 29, and was pushing the ideal.

She was at a loss and didn't know what to do with herself. She wasn't the type to rely on others for everyday tasks. To give herself a feeling of usefulness she took up some mundane housewife duties. Most days she would deliver Roy's handmade lunch to the office. She often practiced cooking and experimenting in the kitchen.

Glacier had taught her how to knit and she had made a scarf for Roy as well as some clothes and a blanket for the baby. There was the occasional paperwork that Roy brought home for her to work on.

The rest of the time she spent reading her books and taking Black Hayate for walks to the park or to visit their friends at Central Headquarters. Life was quite different than it had been. At first she thought she might go stir crazy. But after getting used to her new life she found it relaxing and quite enjoyable.

She never imagined she would live this kind of life. A life other than the one she had in the military severing under Roy seemed so out of reach in the past. Now, all the events that had come to pass started to feel like a hazy dream. Even the nightmares of Ishbal didn't seem to reach her any more.

Riza's heart fluttered as she looked proudly at her husband as he placed a second chair at the side of his desk. She sat down and joined him for lunch in the office. She couldn't imagine life getting any better than this.

Fin

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Author's Note: Done! Finally! It's been a long road and I thank each and every one of you that has been there to travel down it with me. For everyone that reviewed I thank you for your time, suggestions, and encouragement. I hope that the ending was satisfying for you. I gave it a lot of thought and decided this had a really good feel to it. Maybe it's almost too picture perfect, but hey, it's fan fic! It's what WE want, to hell with the anime studio that screwed up the story in the first place.

And now this leaves me with Memories of the past to complete. I hope to see you all reviewing that one next. Take care and have a wonderful summer!


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